Posted September 30, 2018

It’s so frustrating isn’t it?  You have made a million attempts at getting that 20 something body back and end up back where you started but one year older and one year further from 20 something.

I was at my kickboxing class today, like I do every Sunday morning.  Always the oldest there but what evs!  I stopped being worried about being the only women or the oldest in the room years ago!  These two young girls come in for the first time.  In their early 20’s.  You know with the perfect skin, tight tush and doing the splits like it’s nothing! (not sure why they started doing the splits but it was impressive!)

I joked around with the instructor saying I would never be the same after.  I was watching them because I have always been curious about humans! lol After watching them do their thing before class started, I realized that as much as they look close to perfect, I look at myself and think for my age my body is amazing.  I am fit and healthy.  I get up every day and maintain my health not so I can look 20 something again, but because I want to be the best and healthiest version of myself at 48.  It boils down to being realistic and accepting that at mid-life shit just ain’t the same!  You can roll with it and be the best version of where you are or wallow in what will never be.

After all, would having that 20 something body even make me happy?  We think the skinny, perfect body will create our happiness but when we lose the weight we still aren’t happy.  Happiness isn’t a look it is a feeling.  Which brings me to the reasons why we don’t reach our health goals.

  1.  You set your goals around a look.  A number on the scale.  Your health isn’t about aiming for the perfect body.  It is aiming for an amazing feeling.  When you set your goals based on how you want to feel, how you want to be living your life and how you want to live your life 20 – 30 years from now, you will be more successful.  It takes time and it takes conscious effort.  It takes being at the point of actually letting go of the old to make room for the new.  We stay where we are because of fear of the new.  We feel more comfortable not liking what we see because we are good at that.  Liking yourself enough to take action based on mindset, a feeling and letting go of bad habits is HARD AS HELL!  Can’t lie.  This past 2 years I have worked on getting out of the chronic dieting, body dysmorphia and the belief system I had.  It took a full year for my mind to let go of old habits.  Not 2 months, not 4 but 12!  Now I no longer binge eat.  I no longer think of food 24/7.  I no longer beat myself up or look at myself with ill feelings.  This brings me to #2!
  2.  You lack patience!  This one is the biggest goal Killers!  Think of how long it took for you to get where you are today.  Did it happen in 2 months, 4 months?  No!  It didn’t even happen in 12 months!  So why is it we suddenly notice our poor health and want it to change in 3 months.  Just so you know, this state you are in didn’t happen over night!  You are just noticing it now. I don’t mean health by how you look or even just better digesstion.  I mean your mindset around it.  You can go on the best diet ever, cut out gluten, dairy, sugar, night shades, coffee, alcohol, animal protein, fast, cut carbs etc (man that is boring as hell ain’t it?) but that doesn’t mean you will maintain the goal you reached.  Adding in mindfulness, stress reduction techniques,  movement etc is the secret sauce but it takes time to make it stick.  It takes you doing the new habits every day.  With effort and action.  If you think by clicking your heels together you can change your life, then you need to stop watching television and get off social media!  Lack of patience when creating a healthy lifestyle is like wanting an amazing relationship without putting in the work.   Slow down!  Breath!
  3. You are aiming for perfection.  Why are we wanting perfection in an imperfect world?  There is no such thing.  There is NO perfect time to get started.  There is NO perfect body.  There is NO perfect journey.  Every single step you take towards your goal is an accomplishment.  You need to start acknowlegding the small things as achievement.  If you lose 20 lbs and focus on thinking you should have lost more by now, you end up getting into old bad habits again.  You end up thinking so negative about your achievements the journey to that amazing goal you set for yourself gets tainted.  You end up judging yourself which is not the answer.  If you couldn’t lose weight and lost 20lbs over time, THAT IS INCREDIBLE!  If you haven’t worked out in 2 years and now going to the gym 3 days a week consistently, THAT IS INCREDIBLE, even if you haven’t lost a lot of weight!  STOP BEING SO HARD ON YOURSELF!  Enjoy the journey, stop judging yourself and most of all live each day in your journey INSPIRED!
  4. You are chroncially dieting and doing too much at once.  Get off the diets all ready!  Do these patterns sound familiar?  Go on diet, lose weight, get uninspired then put weight back on,  Go on diet, lose weight, get uninspired then put weight back on and so forth on so on.  Goes to they gym for 2 hours a day, gets tired, burnt out and bored, stops going to the gym and this cycle repeats again and again.  The definition of INSANITY is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. Just because you put in the work, doesn’t mean you will get the result you want! Why? Because the body is incredible!  If you keep dieting and being judgey, your body can see the result coming.  It will protect you in any way possible.  So back to old habits you go.  Your body would rather stay where it is then be tortured with dieting and militant exercise.  Also your body will eventually say “ok she is starving me so I will stop the production of leptin and hold on to fat”. Leptin is a hormone that tells your body whether to burn fat or store it.  YOU NEED TO CREATE A LIFESTYLE CHANGE!  If you haven’t noticed yet, the diets aren’t working.  Take your time.  Focus on a feeling.  Get rid of old habits and most of all create an inspired journey (eating, movement and mindset).
  5. If you are Canadian, our health Care system stops you! Yes I said it.  It is amazing we don’t have to pay out of pocket for our “SICK Care”.  It is not health care.  We don’t go there healthy we go there sick.  In the U.S. people don’t hesitate to spend money on health and wellness programs because they would rather drop $3000 then 10’s of thousands on a hospital bill.  When you think about it, it is nuts how Canadians don’t invest in their health. Unconsciously you don’t bother because you feel like our health Care system will just cure it if you get sick.  But this is so backwards I don’t know where to start.  I personally, would like to avoid the doctor and hospital!  I do everything possible to avoid this but not in desperation!  I wake up every day and work on my health based on a feeling and the picture in my head of how I want to feel and live.  YOU SHOULD BE INVESTING IN YOUR WELLNESS NOW, not wait until you are sick so it’s covered.  This is insane!  I know many people in my life that if they had of invested in their health, they may just be still with us today.
  6. You don’t believe in yourself enough.  This is so common.  We diet and go back to where we started way to often and then we create our own troubles.  We don’t trust ourselves to stick to it or to make positive change.  STOP feeling sorry for yourself, STOP judging yourself, STOP being negative and START realizing you are human.  You make mistakes.  You will stumble you might even fall.  But you didn’t make it this far in life by giving up.  You can make change that sticks you just need to work on it consciously every day.  This is where patience comes it.  This is where you need to find out what is missing in your life. This is where you need to know you are worth every single second you put into positive change.  And this is definitely where you need to discover your purpose and roll with that bad boy!  (don’t make an actually bad boy your purpose.  That never leads to anything good!) YOU NEED SUPPORT, ACCOUTABILITY AND A SYSTEM THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CHANGE FREE OF JUDGEMENT AND DIETS! ALLOWING YOU TO SUCCEED.
  7. This is one you all need to pay attention to!  You are not reaching your health goals because…. YOU ARE TOO BUSY READING BLOGS LIKE THIS ON REASONS WHY OR WAYS TO!  Yes I want you to come visit my page and in all honesty I do these blogs to get your attention!  You can read all the blogs, websites and books you want.  Information doesn’t mean action.  Action means action.  Just like me as a trainer taking courses and going to school continuously then filing all the workbooks and certs on a book shelf without implementing any of it.  Pointless!  When I get information I make a point of using it.  If I can’t seem to get the hang of it, I hire someone to help me!  I’ve had fitness coaches on and off since I started in this industry.  I have always had a mentor.  I currently have a business coach.  We can not do this on our own!  If we could we would be doing it.  We think changing our habits are easy.  But it is not!  So if you stumble and stray, it is ok.  Really it is.  It isn’t that you stray from your goal it’s how you recover.

This blog may even inspire you to want to change so I suggest if it does, go take action right now.  Right after you read this!  Sign up for a program that not just throws a diet at you but supports real change.  One that allows you to regain your intuitiveness and sense of self.  Take your time. Stop judging yourself.  Acknowledge every step towards your goal as an achievement! Don’t try to take it all on yourself, get a coach!  Aim for PROGRESS not perfection. Most of all if you read blogs like this because you want to change, then change.  Don’t just read about it or talk about it.  Get up off that thang and do yourself a favor!

If you would like a great example of balanced eating; how to do it and why it is important, Click here to download my FREE guide called THE INSPIRED MEAL.  It helps you learn easily how to eat balanced and the importance of using your senses for a more inspired meal. Creating more energy, better digestion and a better metabolism.  Sensual eating is science! Yes it is!!!  Believe it or not!  Check it out!

To your health,

Carmen Shawn